Crush on someone but in a relationship

Is It Normal To Have Crushes While You're In A Serious Relationship? | Her Campus

crush on someone but in a relationship

Developing a crush on someone when you're already in a long-term, committed relationship can leave you feeling guilty and confused. You may think it's a. Having a crush when you're in a relationship is a bloody tricky business. It's hard enough when you're single. Unrequited feelings, awkward. But you're not single, you've got a loving committed partner and you want to “ Developing a crush on someone other than your long term partner is “Just because you are in a relationship doesn't mean you suddenly stop.

What characteristics or behaviors of that person knock you off your feet? How are those things like you or unlike you? The feelings of emotional arousal a crush evokes strike us like lightning, awakening us to repressed memories and longings—indeed, to our very life force.

When Having A Crush While In A Relationship Is OK (And When It's Not) | HuffPost Life

This is why we may feel like we literally cannot live without the object of our affections. Far too often, when drawn like a meteor to someone other than their partner, people rush to the conclusion that the partner is not fulfilling them. Crushes reveal parts of ourselves that we have not courted for a long time. They signal unlived aspects of our full and embodied expression. Crushes can also help us play out and recognize our own not-so-healthy relationship patterns in ways that are not entirely destructive: Her other relationships were healthy, but some hidden part of her was fulfilled by the inconsistency she felt with her crush.

crush on someone but in a relationship

Adding Excitement, Possibility, and Passion to Everyday Life Sometimes crushes serve the purpose of enlivening an otherwise committed, devoted domestic life. My friend Laura talked about her three-year crush; how a day was made euphoric if she had contact with him, and so dull if not.

How To Handle A Crush When You're Already Committed | Chatelaine

Looking back, Laura realized that the sheer energy of the obsession had animated her life with vivid color during a particularly challenging period in her family and professional lives. She was walking the safe sidewalks of home and family in the outer world…and riding the cascading rapids of lows and highs in her fantasy world. A crush can provide a private space for vitality and excitement in a life full of responsibilities that rarely has a moment of complete autonomy.

crush on someone but in a relationship

Being in the thick of a crush can make us feel sexy and beautiful, and can inspire us to enhance our self-care, which in turn makes us feel more appealing. The world can seem more alive—music, nature, sex, and food all become more sensually stimulating when we are awash in the emotional high of a crush. It can point us toward parts of ourselves that want more attention and development.

When Having A Crush While In A Relationship Is OK (And When It's Not)

A crush can bring Technicolor to a life that has faded to more dismal hues. Bring Your Sexy Back There is no moral wrongdoing in harboring a crush; the problems come when we act them out, possibly against our own values or in ways that harm others.

crush on someone but in a relationship

A breach of trust may have made you feel more distant: How can I work on my relationship? One question people often ask is: One way to address this is by talking about it with someone you trust and who will keep it to themselves.

crush on someone but in a relationship

This could be a friend or family member. How, when and where you have this conversation is as important as what you say — you may find it very useful to read our article on communication tips to try with your partner.

This will help you think about ways to broach difficult topics without things turning into a row and how you could communicate effectively and clearly.

crush on someone but in a relationship

What you need to talk about will depend on your situation, but you might like to think about the following: Do we spend as much time together as we used to, and if not, why not? Do we make time to have fun together or just relax together? Have we been taking each other for granted? Moving on from the crush — practical steps We develop crushes on all kinds of people. Depending on who it is, this can be quite straightforward or it might require some bigger changes.

How we can help Making changes in your relationship is rarely a short process.